Deuteronomy 6:5-7 “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength. And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. YOU SHALL TEACH THEM DILIGENTLY TO YOUR CHILDREN, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up.”
There is a lot in these few short verses! I will not be going into the first verse about loving God with all of our heart, soul and strength! That is a major challenge in itself! That command is pretty clear and pretty much covers the manner in which we should live our lives! You know at least some of what you need to do in order to flesh that out, but I want to go on into what it means to teach our children diligently. What should we teach them and what are some specific things we can do to make sure this commandment gets followed in our homes? The thoughts in Deuteronomy 6 will be covered in two or three postings, so I will just be covering some thoughts about what needs to be taught and some practical ways to accomplish it.
According to Webster’s dictionary, the word ‘diligent’ means “to persevere with careful steady work”. This implies that teaching diligently isn’t something that can be accomplished in a very short time. It is my understanding that “teaching diligently” would take a lifetime. Now over the lifetime of our children from babyhood to adulthood, the style and content of the teaching would change, but it looks to me like it is an ongoing effort. There is no implication that there is a starting and an ending time.
So, what is it that we are to teach? Verse 6 says that we are to teach “these words which I command you today”. Then we look one verse ahead of that and we see in verse 5 the command to “love the Lord your God with all your heart…soul and ...strength.” So from this, I understand that we are to teach our children that God is to have first place in their lives! Well, as I have been thinking about this, I am not really sure that any of us really knows what that would look like, but I do know that most of us are not there and it is something that we need to work on VERY ‘diligently’!
So what are some practical and specific ways that we can accomplish this teaching? Verse7 tells us to “talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up.” This pretty much encompasses the whole 24 hours in the day! I think this means that our Christian faith is pretty much a way of life and not something we put on and take off as we walk through our life! It means that when we are sitting in our homes, there should be reference to God and our Lord Jesus as if He were there in person. At first it may take effort to try to work conversation about God into your everyday household conversation, and you should take that effort to do it! For instance, when you are enjoying a fresh homemade cookie, talk about how thankful you are that God has provided us with stoves for baking good cookies. Talk about how wonderful it is that God made things grow so you could have the chocolate chips that are in the cookies! And of course, there is the usual prayer at the meals, but it needs to be more than that. When you are out walking (and you should be making time to be out walking with your children), talk about all the beauty and things that God has created. Probably one of the easiest things is to approach this idea by repeating all of the things for which you can be thankful. When you lie down is a good time to rehearse all of the wonders of the day and if the day wasn’t so wonderful, you can remember that God was there and gave strength for the day and how He has good plans for tomorrow. And of course, when you get up is a good time to pray and ask for God’s help and guidance for a new day! One big condition about all of this is that you need to be there in order to accomplish this. This will take time and it will take planning at first, but the rewards are eternal and well worth the effort!
Just one short thought to finish off for today is to remember that one of the main ways to accomplish this whole task is to live a good example of Godliness and thankfulness. As your children go from small children to being adults, it probably becomes more important than ever to live a Godly and thankful example. Adult children need you to show them how to live in the culture that is constantly changing. It is typical for your example to become more important while the words you speak become fewer.
Next time, I will continue this thought and cover some more in Deuteronomy 6. Trust you will have a great week and now I am off to make sure that I accomplish these things as I live my life before my adult children and my young grandchildren!
Showing posts with label womanhood. Show all posts
Showing posts with label womanhood. Show all posts
Saturday, April 5, 2008
Saturday, March 1, 2008
A New Baby
Today as I sit here at home and wait for a call that I need to go to the hospital to welcome a new grandbaby, I am reflecting on the culture we live in and the world in which that precious little baby will grow up! We do not know if this baby is a boy or a girl, but no matter the gender, the intelligence or any other characteristic of this little baby, he/she will face many challenges that his parents, his grandparents, his extended family and every Christian he knows will need to help him through!
I haven’t written for a while for various reasons, but I have become very burdened by what is going on in our political climate and wondering how I can help young parents face the challenges that are rampant today! I am going to try over the next few weeks to react and to respond to some of the things that I am hearing and hope that it may be of help to you.
One of the words that is often being used today is the word “hope”. As I listen, (and I am quite interested in the political scene) I hear that word just batted around as if just the ability to have “hope” is all that matters. I haven’t heard anyone yet tell us what reason we have for having “hope”! I am here to tell you that “hope” in “hope” will get you nothing! “Hope” in some intangible idea or thing will also accomplish nothing. We need to have our “hope” IN something.
My challenge to you moms and parents is to give your children something IN which to hope. And the best thing that I know of to be the object of that “hope” is God. God, in His Word, not only tells us to have “hope”, He tells us where to place our hope and why. In Psalm 146:5-10 a.) (NKJV) it says: “Happy is he who has the God of Jacob for His help, whose ‘hope’ is in the Lord his God, Who made Heaven and earth, the sea and all that is in them; Who keeps truth forever, Who executes justice for the oppressed, Who gives food to the hungry. The Lord gives freedom to the prisoners. The Lord opens the eyes of the blind; the Lord raises those who are bowed down; the Lord loves the righteous. The Lord watches over the strangers; He relieves the fatherless and the widow; but the way of the wicked He turns upside down. The Lord shall reign forever--”
That list not only covers many of the needs that we face in America today, but God has great credentials, don’t you think?! And talk about experience…! I pray that as we all face the coming days and months and all that is transpiring in our great country, we will remember that, as the song says, “Our ‘hope’ is in the Lord” and not in anything that any of the politicians tell us about what they are going to do! Our job is to pray and seek God’s will and best plan for us and for our families. This is the reason that I can be excited and thrilled as I wait for the new life that God is placing in our family today or some day soon! On my own and with the things I see and hear with my own eyes and ears, I would be very apprehensive and pessimistic, but when I read Psalm 146, I see GREAT HOPE in the God Who created the Heaven and the earth and will reign forever! With that “hope”, I can hold that precious new grandbaby and know that with God’s help, I can make a difference for him and for all the other grandchildren God has and will bless me with!
With that in mind, may I keep my eyes on God and keep focused on my mission so that I can be that help and support that all who are living in this world are looking for. Praise the Lord for the ‘hope’ we have in Him!!!
I haven’t written for a while for various reasons, but I have become very burdened by what is going on in our political climate and wondering how I can help young parents face the challenges that are rampant today! I am going to try over the next few weeks to react and to respond to some of the things that I am hearing and hope that it may be of help to you.
One of the words that is often being used today is the word “hope”. As I listen, (and I am quite interested in the political scene) I hear that word just batted around as if just the ability to have “hope” is all that matters. I haven’t heard anyone yet tell us what reason we have for having “hope”! I am here to tell you that “hope” in “hope” will get you nothing! “Hope” in some intangible idea or thing will also accomplish nothing. We need to have our “hope” IN something.
My challenge to you moms and parents is to give your children something IN which to hope. And the best thing that I know of to be the object of that “hope” is God. God, in His Word, not only tells us to have “hope”, He tells us where to place our hope and why. In Psalm 146:5-10 a.) (NKJV) it says: “Happy is he who has the God of Jacob for His help, whose ‘hope’ is in the Lord his God, Who made Heaven and earth, the sea and all that is in them; Who keeps truth forever, Who executes justice for the oppressed, Who gives food to the hungry. The Lord gives freedom to the prisoners. The Lord opens the eyes of the blind; the Lord raises those who are bowed down; the Lord loves the righteous. The Lord watches over the strangers; He relieves the fatherless and the widow; but the way of the wicked He turns upside down. The Lord shall reign forever--”
That list not only covers many of the needs that we face in America today, but God has great credentials, don’t you think?! And talk about experience…! I pray that as we all face the coming days and months and all that is transpiring in our great country, we will remember that, as the song says, “Our ‘hope’ is in the Lord” and not in anything that any of the politicians tell us about what they are going to do! Our job is to pray and seek God’s will and best plan for us and for our families. This is the reason that I can be excited and thrilled as I wait for the new life that God is placing in our family today or some day soon! On my own and with the things I see and hear with my own eyes and ears, I would be very apprehensive and pessimistic, but when I read Psalm 146, I see GREAT HOPE in the God Who created the Heaven and the earth and will reign forever! With that “hope”, I can hold that precious new grandbaby and know that with God’s help, I can make a difference for him and for all the other grandchildren God has and will bless me with!
With that in mind, may I keep my eyes on God and keep focused on my mission so that I can be that help and support that all who are living in this world are looking for. Praise the Lord for the ‘hope’ we have in Him!!!
Friday, September 7, 2007
Modesty - Part 1
I can’t write the date of September 7 without remembering that it was 34 years ago today that I became a mother! And what a wonderful ride it has been! Happy Birthday, Tim!
I told you last week that I was going to talk about modesty today, and I will. I briefly covered some things related to this topic on June 2 when I was covering Titus 2. However, since then I did some more extensive study on the topic and taught it in our church Ladies Bible Study, so I want to cover it more thoroughly now.
This is a topic about which I am VERY passionate, and I pray that I can pass some of that passion on to those who read this. I first of all want to remind all of us that God created the genders and He created marriage and the normal attraction between the genders. He created men to be visually stimulated and to be attracted to females in a physical way in order that His design for marriage and reproduction might be fulfilled. (Genesis 2:24 and Malachi 2:15) He created females to be responsive and very relational in order that they might be able to love their husbands and nurture the children that are God’s intended fruit of that marriage union. So, the fact that men respond to the sensual manner of dress among women that we see flaunted so brazenly in our culture, is not a surprise to God and it shouldn’t be a surprise to us. It should however, be a caution to us as women to be careful how we dress so as not to defraud our Christian brothers (or those outside the Body who don’t even know how to control the stimulation they receive from seeing such things). (Just a note here on what it means to defraud someone – It is like placing several bowls of fine chocolate around my house and then telling me that I can’t have any! When we “tease” our Brothers by what we wear, but then there is no way, either righteously or any other way they can act upon their desires, we are defrauding them!)
Now one thing that we need to make perfectly clear is that men are totally and solely responsible for any acts of immorality that they commit! Women, however, sin when they consciously or carelessly place temptation before men (defraud) so as to cause them to lust sinfully! (I Thessalonians 4:1-6)
I would like to mention a few comments I heard on a tape called “Not Even a Hint” by Joshua Harris. (If you think you are familiar with that name, I will remind you that he is the young man who wrote the book, “I Kissed Dating Good-Bye”.) I trust that these thoughts stated by him will help make the case for why this is such an important issue and why we as Christian women need to be educated on this topic. I fear that, though some flaunt their bodies knowingly before men, many are just plain not aware of or simply don’t care how this affects men or of the mandates in Scripture concerning this very important issue!
Here are the statements from the tape, and though maybe not verbatim, they are close to direct quotes:
1. “Modesty is about saving the delight of your body for ONE man, your husband.”
2. “Modesty is a matter of the Heart, Life, and Manner of dress.”
3. “God has given women a precious and powerful gift.”
4. “The purity God calls us to is a ‘gift’ for us.”
5. “Sin has infected and affected everything that God created.”
6. “Our culture encourages women to flaunt their sexuality! Fashion trends exploit sexuality and emphasize sexual parts of the body.”
7. “You are the only person on this planet who can protect your spouse sexually.”
8. Then Josh quoted Al Mohler (President of the Southern Baptist Convention): “Men are tempted to give themselves to pornography, while women are tempted to commit pornography.” (Josh Harris: “When women dress in such a way so as to arouse sexual desire in a man, they are committing pornography.”)
My heart desires to share this material in a straightforward manner so as to cause us to be aware of the problem and to build up a love and concern for our Christian brothers that will manifest itself in our desire to protect them in any way we can and help to build them up spiritually (Romans 15:1; Hebrews 10:24) and not break down their defenses. Please pray about your response to this and let’s search the Scripture to see how we can accomplish this goal. Next week I will give more specific guidelines and Scripture that will help us to grow in this very important area.
I told you last week that I was going to talk about modesty today, and I will. I briefly covered some things related to this topic on June 2 when I was covering Titus 2. However, since then I did some more extensive study on the topic and taught it in our church Ladies Bible Study, so I want to cover it more thoroughly now.
This is a topic about which I am VERY passionate, and I pray that I can pass some of that passion on to those who read this. I first of all want to remind all of us that God created the genders and He created marriage and the normal attraction between the genders. He created men to be visually stimulated and to be attracted to females in a physical way in order that His design for marriage and reproduction might be fulfilled. (Genesis 2:24 and Malachi 2:15) He created females to be responsive and very relational in order that they might be able to love their husbands and nurture the children that are God’s intended fruit of that marriage union. So, the fact that men respond to the sensual manner of dress among women that we see flaunted so brazenly in our culture, is not a surprise to God and it shouldn’t be a surprise to us. It should however, be a caution to us as women to be careful how we dress so as not to defraud our Christian brothers (or those outside the Body who don’t even know how to control the stimulation they receive from seeing such things). (Just a note here on what it means to defraud someone – It is like placing several bowls of fine chocolate around my house and then telling me that I can’t have any! When we “tease” our Brothers by what we wear, but then there is no way, either righteously or any other way they can act upon their desires, we are defrauding them!)
Now one thing that we need to make perfectly clear is that men are totally and solely responsible for any acts of immorality that they commit! Women, however, sin when they consciously or carelessly place temptation before men (defraud) so as to cause them to lust sinfully! (I Thessalonians 4:1-6)
I would like to mention a few comments I heard on a tape called “Not Even a Hint” by Joshua Harris. (If you think you are familiar with that name, I will remind you that he is the young man who wrote the book, “I Kissed Dating Good-Bye”.) I trust that these thoughts stated by him will help make the case for why this is such an important issue and why we as Christian women need to be educated on this topic. I fear that, though some flaunt their bodies knowingly before men, many are just plain not aware of or simply don’t care how this affects men or of the mandates in Scripture concerning this very important issue!
Here are the statements from the tape, and though maybe not verbatim, they are close to direct quotes:
1. “Modesty is about saving the delight of your body for ONE man, your husband.”
2. “Modesty is a matter of the Heart, Life, and Manner of dress.”
3. “God has given women a precious and powerful gift.”
4. “The purity God calls us to is a ‘gift’ for us.”
5. “Sin has infected and affected everything that God created.”
6. “Our culture encourages women to flaunt their sexuality! Fashion trends exploit sexuality and emphasize sexual parts of the body.”
7. “You are the only person on this planet who can protect your spouse sexually.”
8. Then Josh quoted Al Mohler (President of the Southern Baptist Convention): “Men are tempted to give themselves to pornography, while women are tempted to commit pornography.” (Josh Harris: “When women dress in such a way so as to arouse sexual desire in a man, they are committing pornography.”)
My heart desires to share this material in a straightforward manner so as to cause us to be aware of the problem and to build up a love and concern for our Christian brothers that will manifest itself in our desire to protect them in any way we can and help to build them up spiritually (Romans 15:1; Hebrews 10:24) and not break down their defenses. Please pray about your response to this and let’s search the Scripture to see how we can accomplish this goal. Next week I will give more specific guidelines and Scripture that will help us to grow in this very important area.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Teach the Young Women to be Obedient to Their Own Husbands
This is a very “new and unique” topic in this present culture! However, it is not unique to God who created male and female and established the rules of how marriage was intended to be!
First of all, notice that it says to be “obedient to their OWN husbands”. This takes us back to our earlier discussion concerning whether women should place themselves under the authority of men who are not their “own” husband in the work place. It is particularly crucial if the other man is going to be requiring time and allegiance that belongs only to your husband. I believe that this gives credence to my earlier statement that women ought to consider this before they take a job outside the home and avoid this circumstance if at all possible!
Now we get to the topic of obedience. This is a bit hard to describe as we live in a culture where these role issues are very distorted and we don’t have a good picture of what this means. Basically, God meant for the relationship between husband and wife to be one big picture, but sin entered in and everything went haywire! God meant for the husband to love his wife as Christ loves the Church and gave Himself for her (Ephesians 5:25). With that in mind, God gave women the responsibility to submit (obey) to the leadership of her husband (Ephesians 5: 22 and Titus 2:5). However, most husbands don’t know what it means to really love their wives as Christ loves the Church and that makes it very difficult for a wife to submit to her husband. Some husbands think that to obey means that he rules and she is his door mat. Husbands in this culture aren’t being encouraged to be the loving Spiritual leaders of their wives, so in some cases the wife must make her own way and the family submits to her. There are so many issues here, and I am not prepared to confront them all, but I do want to speak to women and I pray that God will use this lesson in your life in whatever circumstance you might find yourself.
Basically, I believe that God designed marriage and that He knows how it works best. He knows that someone must be in charge and someone must follow. He gave it to the husband to be the leader and the wife is to follow. His intention was for the husband to love his wife and lead her in a loving and gentle way and for the wife to respond with loving submission. When sin came into the world, things changed drastically and mankind has never recovered. However, God repeated His design for marriage in the New Testament and it is to be our lifelong desire and goal to obey His desires in this area. God used the example of a marriage relationship as His picture to the world of how much He loves the Church and gave His Son for the Church (Ephesians 5:25). It is therefore VERY important for us as Christians to present to the world an undistorted picture of marriage where the husband loves his wife and she lovingly submits for a lifetime.
As none of us is perfect, we must daily make course corrections in order to keep the picture pure. If we have a husband who is not fulfilling his part of the plan, we must pick up the slack and do the best we can to still respond in a Godly manner. God does not let us off the hook at that point, but He tells us to stay with our husband and do everything we can to win him for the Lord. So, if you have a Godly husband who loves you in a Christ-like way, praise the Lord and do everything you can to keep him happy and to submit to him in a loving manner. If you don’t have a husband who is loving you as Christ loved the Church, then lovingly submit to him anyway and pray for him and do everything you can do to let him see the love of God in you! Remember: You can only control your own attitude and that is your responsibility! God is at work and He will do the work that needs to be done in your husband and He may very well use you to help accomplish that, so be sure you are up to and ready for that task!
I will be away from the computer for a couple of weeks now, so I pray that you are all having a great summer! When I get back, I will start a new series as this pretty well finishes Titus 2. “Talk” to you soon!
First of all, notice that it says to be “obedient to their OWN husbands”. This takes us back to our earlier discussion concerning whether women should place themselves under the authority of men who are not their “own” husband in the work place. It is particularly crucial if the other man is going to be requiring time and allegiance that belongs only to your husband. I believe that this gives credence to my earlier statement that women ought to consider this before they take a job outside the home and avoid this circumstance if at all possible!
Now we get to the topic of obedience. This is a bit hard to describe as we live in a culture where these role issues are very distorted and we don’t have a good picture of what this means. Basically, God meant for the relationship between husband and wife to be one big picture, but sin entered in and everything went haywire! God meant for the husband to love his wife as Christ loves the Church and gave Himself for her (Ephesians 5:25). With that in mind, God gave women the responsibility to submit (obey) to the leadership of her husband (Ephesians 5: 22 and Titus 2:5). However, most husbands don’t know what it means to really love their wives as Christ loves the Church and that makes it very difficult for a wife to submit to her husband. Some husbands think that to obey means that he rules and she is his door mat. Husbands in this culture aren’t being encouraged to be the loving Spiritual leaders of their wives, so in some cases the wife must make her own way and the family submits to her. There are so many issues here, and I am not prepared to confront them all, but I do want to speak to women and I pray that God will use this lesson in your life in whatever circumstance you might find yourself.
Basically, I believe that God designed marriage and that He knows how it works best. He knows that someone must be in charge and someone must follow. He gave it to the husband to be the leader and the wife is to follow. His intention was for the husband to love his wife and lead her in a loving and gentle way and for the wife to respond with loving submission. When sin came into the world, things changed drastically and mankind has never recovered. However, God repeated His design for marriage in the New Testament and it is to be our lifelong desire and goal to obey His desires in this area. God used the example of a marriage relationship as His picture to the world of how much He loves the Church and gave His Son for the Church (Ephesians 5:25). It is therefore VERY important for us as Christians to present to the world an undistorted picture of marriage where the husband loves his wife and she lovingly submits for a lifetime.
As none of us is perfect, we must daily make course corrections in order to keep the picture pure. If we have a husband who is not fulfilling his part of the plan, we must pick up the slack and do the best we can to still respond in a Godly manner. God does not let us off the hook at that point, but He tells us to stay with our husband and do everything we can to win him for the Lord. So, if you have a Godly husband who loves you in a Christ-like way, praise the Lord and do everything you can to keep him happy and to submit to him in a loving manner. If you don’t have a husband who is loving you as Christ loved the Church, then lovingly submit to him anyway and pray for him and do everything you can do to let him see the love of God in you! Remember: You can only control your own attitude and that is your responsibility! God is at work and He will do the work that needs to be done in your husband and He may very well use you to help accomplish that, so be sure you are up to and ready for that task!
I will be away from the computer for a couple of weeks now, so I pray that you are all having a great summer! When I get back, I will start a new series as this pretty well finishes Titus 2. “Talk” to you soon!
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
Teach the Young Women to be Good
At first glance, this quality seems to be pretty obvious, but I do think there are some thoughts that bear reviewing even on this character.
We live in a world, where there are really a lot of “good people”. So there must be some things which distinguish this kind of “good” from that which we see in the world around us. In my understanding, I believe that a lot of those distinguishing qualities have to do with the motives which drive our desire to be “good”. As Christian ladies, our desire to be “good” should be motivated by our love for and our desire to please the Lord. And I believe that should in some way be clear to those who know us.
There are many areas of life in which we women should be “good” and I believe the first one is in the area of our homes. In Proverbs 31:12, we read, “She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.” This refers to the way she treats her husband. We have already discussed some of the ways we can love our husbands, so I won’t go into a whole new discussion of that. But we just need to remember that our husband is a gift from God and no matter how much good we receive from him or how deserving we think he is, we are to be good to our husband. This means that we will spend our life seeking to enhance the ministry God has given him and helping him to achieve his potential before God. Remember, God created the woman “for” the man (Genesis 2:18), so this is our primary responsibility in life! We also need to be good to our children. This doesn’t mean giving them everything they desire, but nourishing and cherishing them and teaching them the things of God.
Then there is the area of everyone else around us. We as ladies are to be seeking to help those in need. Again, in Proverbs 31, though it is obvious that her main ministry was to her family, in verse 20 we read that, “She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” If this is to be different from every other charity group in the community we need to strive to have a different motive and a different message than the rest of them. Those to whom we minister need to know that our motivation is to please God and carry out the ministry that He has given us to do. In other words, with our giving of good things needs to be a message of hope and salvation that is different from the others,
And finally, I think that the meaning of “good” in this passage has to do with a general life style and pattern to promote goodness in every area of our lives. It should influence the way we talk to our children and our husband, the way we interact with everyone around us, the general atmosphere that is evident in our homes when strangers come by and just the wonderful way that others can see Jesus living in our lives and affecting even how we look!
I trust this will give you a little insight into what it means for a Christian lady to be “good” in the Biblical sense of that word.
We live in a world, where there are really a lot of “good people”. So there must be some things which distinguish this kind of “good” from that which we see in the world around us. In my understanding, I believe that a lot of those distinguishing qualities have to do with the motives which drive our desire to be “good”. As Christian ladies, our desire to be “good” should be motivated by our love for and our desire to please the Lord. And I believe that should in some way be clear to those who know us.
There are many areas of life in which we women should be “good” and I believe the first one is in the area of our homes. In Proverbs 31:12, we read, “She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.” This refers to the way she treats her husband. We have already discussed some of the ways we can love our husbands, so I won’t go into a whole new discussion of that. But we just need to remember that our husband is a gift from God and no matter how much good we receive from him or how deserving we think he is, we are to be good to our husband. This means that we will spend our life seeking to enhance the ministry God has given him and helping him to achieve his potential before God. Remember, God created the woman “for” the man (Genesis 2:18), so this is our primary responsibility in life! We also need to be good to our children. This doesn’t mean giving them everything they desire, but nourishing and cherishing them and teaching them the things of God.
Then there is the area of everyone else around us. We as ladies are to be seeking to help those in need. Again, in Proverbs 31, though it is obvious that her main ministry was to her family, in verse 20 we read that, “She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” If this is to be different from every other charity group in the community we need to strive to have a different motive and a different message than the rest of them. Those to whom we minister need to know that our motivation is to please God and carry out the ministry that He has given us to do. In other words, with our giving of good things needs to be a message of hope and salvation that is different from the others,
And finally, I think that the meaning of “good” in this passage has to do with a general life style and pattern to promote goodness in every area of our lives. It should influence the way we talk to our children and our husband, the way we interact with everyone around us, the general atmosphere that is evident in our homes when strangers come by and just the wonderful way that others can see Jesus living in our lives and affecting even how we look!
I trust this will give you a little insight into what it means for a Christian lady to be “good” in the Biblical sense of that word.
Sunday, July 1, 2007
Teach the Younger Women to ... Be Keepers at Home
Last week I wrote on being “keepers at home” and I included two thoughts about why I think that is an important concept for all of us women to consider. The first idea that I covered was the fact that working in a place with men other than our husbands makes women vulnerable to the possibility of making relationships with men with whom they work which is not a good thing. I also commented on the fact that God has given women many ministries within and outside of the church and many of those aren’t getting done because so many Christian women are in the work place. If your children are grown and you have a job where you are used for the growth of God’s Kingdom, then praise Him and be sure that you are following the guidelines in the Scripture on how you approach your situation.
Today I want to cover two other reasons that I believe God would have young women to be “keepers at home”. The first one today has to do with the care of your children. I believe with all my heart that mothers and dads should raise their own children. I can’t give you a verse and reference for this thought, but I just know that most all of the guidelines in the Scripture given for parenting are given to parents and not to babysitters! And since God has given the dads the main responsibility of earning the living for the family, that leaves moms home to care for the children. I think that one of the main reasons we are where we are as a culture is that moms have given the privilege of raising their children to others! I don’t care how loving the caretaker you find, she is not going to love and teach your child as you do. And if you think that your child just loves to be out with other children and learning to “socialize”, you may very well be mistaken. From my experience, children love the security of being home and being in the same environment during their formative years! And don’t expect your child to necessarily tell you that. A young baby or young child has no way of expressing himself and you are responsible to do the right thing for him from your own Biblical understanding of what he needs.
Remember the verse I talked about in one of the earlier lessons? Deuteronomy 6:6&7: “And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them DILIGENTLY (emphasis is mine) unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.” In order to accomplish the intent of this verse, I believe it takes more than the short time and diminished amount of energy that is left after a busy day of doing whatever one might do outside the home. There is so much to teach and so much learning that needs to be taught in order to help protect our children from the culture, we must remember that when God gives us children that becomes our full time job; and though the responsibilities change, we never “retire” from the job of being a mother! By the way, when God wrote through Paul that women are to be keepers at home, I don’t believe He just meant not to have a job outside the home. There are many other ways a woman can violate this principle and you know the areas where you might be crossing the line.
My final thought that I would like to cover on this topic of being a “keeper at home” is also VERY important. When we marry, we willingly put ourselves under the umbrella of the man that God has given us to be our husband. When we work outside the home, we are putting ourselves under the authority of another man who, in most cases, is not our husband. That means that conflicts could arise. What if your boss requires something that conflicts with the desires of your husband? Maybe your boss expects you to travel away from home? What if your boss expects long hours that interfere with your responsibility at home to make the evening meal for your husband? How will you resolve that conflict? In reality, your husband’s desires should trump the requirements of the boss. And please don’t buy the “feel good “ lines of the culture that tell us that if we are both bringing in our “share” of the income, then we both take on “our share” of the household work. Now, there are things at home that men do that we just kind of expect them to do. But in general, women are given the responsibility of keeping the home and making it comfortable for our families. The other consideration on this topic (I kind of covered it last time, but I think it bears repeating) has to do with spending that much time with someone that isn’t your husband and how you must dress for your job. My guess is that if you work in an office, you probably dress more professionally and spend more time “looking good” than you would if you were spending the day home cleaning house. That is just the opposite of how it should be. Your husband deserves your best as you have the most invested in that relationship. “Looking good” in the office is also a bit of a danger as we don’t want to attract the attention of men that aren’t our husbands.
I pray that you will all take these blog entries in the spirit in which they are written. Remember, these are things that I would want my own daughters and grand daughters to know for the protection of their own marriages and for the Spiritual well-being of their own children. You are just sitting in on my very personal “chats” with my girls and I pray that they will be a challenge and an encouragement in your lives! And above all, may God use these feeble words for His Glory in the lives of whoever may read them! Next time I will take a break and do something related to July 4 which has and always will have a very special place in my heart!
Today I want to cover two other reasons that I believe God would have young women to be “keepers at home”. The first one today has to do with the care of your children. I believe with all my heart that mothers and dads should raise their own children. I can’t give you a verse and reference for this thought, but I just know that most all of the guidelines in the Scripture given for parenting are given to parents and not to babysitters! And since God has given the dads the main responsibility of earning the living for the family, that leaves moms home to care for the children. I think that one of the main reasons we are where we are as a culture is that moms have given the privilege of raising their children to others! I don’t care how loving the caretaker you find, she is not going to love and teach your child as you do. And if you think that your child just loves to be out with other children and learning to “socialize”, you may very well be mistaken. From my experience, children love the security of being home and being in the same environment during their formative years! And don’t expect your child to necessarily tell you that. A young baby or young child has no way of expressing himself and you are responsible to do the right thing for him from your own Biblical understanding of what he needs.
Remember the verse I talked about in one of the earlier lessons? Deuteronomy 6:6&7: “And these words, which I command thee this day, shall be in thine heart: And thou shalt teach them DILIGENTLY (emphasis is mine) unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.” In order to accomplish the intent of this verse, I believe it takes more than the short time and diminished amount of energy that is left after a busy day of doing whatever one might do outside the home. There is so much to teach and so much learning that needs to be taught in order to help protect our children from the culture, we must remember that when God gives us children that becomes our full time job; and though the responsibilities change, we never “retire” from the job of being a mother! By the way, when God wrote through Paul that women are to be keepers at home, I don’t believe He just meant not to have a job outside the home. There are many other ways a woman can violate this principle and you know the areas where you might be crossing the line.
My final thought that I would like to cover on this topic of being a “keeper at home” is also VERY important. When we marry, we willingly put ourselves under the umbrella of the man that God has given us to be our husband. When we work outside the home, we are putting ourselves under the authority of another man who, in most cases, is not our husband. That means that conflicts could arise. What if your boss requires something that conflicts with the desires of your husband? Maybe your boss expects you to travel away from home? What if your boss expects long hours that interfere with your responsibility at home to make the evening meal for your husband? How will you resolve that conflict? In reality, your husband’s desires should trump the requirements of the boss. And please don’t buy the “feel good “ lines of the culture that tell us that if we are both bringing in our “share” of the income, then we both take on “our share” of the household work. Now, there are things at home that men do that we just kind of expect them to do. But in general, women are given the responsibility of keeping the home and making it comfortable for our families. The other consideration on this topic (I kind of covered it last time, but I think it bears repeating) has to do with spending that much time with someone that isn’t your husband and how you must dress for your job. My guess is that if you work in an office, you probably dress more professionally and spend more time “looking good” than you would if you were spending the day home cleaning house. That is just the opposite of how it should be. Your husband deserves your best as you have the most invested in that relationship. “Looking good” in the office is also a bit of a danger as we don’t want to attract the attention of men that aren’t our husbands.
I pray that you will all take these blog entries in the spirit in which they are written. Remember, these are things that I would want my own daughters and grand daughters to know for the protection of their own marriages and for the Spiritual well-being of their own children. You are just sitting in on my very personal “chats” with my girls and I pray that they will be a challenge and an encouragement in your lives! And above all, may God use these feeble words for His Glory in the lives of whoever may read them! Next time I will take a break and do something related to July 4 which has and always will have a very special place in my heart!
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Teach Young Women to be Keepers at Home
Part I
Well, we are back home after a wonderful time in Minnesota. Our kids gave my husband and me a little “get away” to Minnesota for our 60th birthdays which are both this year. They planned a B & B for us along with some fun eating, dinner train, riverboat lunch, and even some spending money! We were very touched and thankful for their love and the way they ministered to our hearts!
Now we are back to the subject at hand. The verse is Titus 2:5 which tells the older women to “teach the younger women to be … keepers at home”. I am very passionate about this topic. I was listening to a message by John MacArthur on this topic once and he said, “What does it mean that women are to be keepers at home? It means that women are to be keepers at home!” It is pretty hard to misinterpret this one. I believe that there are several reasons why God encouraged women to be “keepers at home”. I will cover some today and the rest next week.
I do not think that there is a huge problem with women earning money. I do not believe that this is the reason for this teaching. After all, Lydia was a seller of purple and we know other women in Scripture who had opportunities to make money. I do believe, however, that if a woman is going find a way to earn some money, she needs to be very careful where she finds that opportunity.
Now I know that there are extenuating circumstances and different conditions in our culture that require some women to be out in the work force, but I also know that many women are in the work force for many other reasons which do not fall into the category of need! Now let me preface this with a thought that I think is Biblical and that is that I believe this is mainly speaking to younger women who have children growing up in their home. I think it is necessary for obvious reasons for single women to be out working and I think that if an older woman has a job where she can be used openly to promote God’s Kingdom, then these cases fall into a different category. Even in these cases, however, I think this should be approached with a great amount of discernment since we live in a culture where we need to always be on our toes because the prince of this world is always on the prowl for the purpose of destroying homes and families.
For instance, we live in a society where people in the work place think nothing of making relationships with people who are not their spouses and they get fooled into thinking that going out to lunch or having a cup of coffee with another woman’s husband is a very innocent event. Besides the consideration of the children in the home, (which I think I will consider next week as a specific topic) the opportunity for contact with the spouses of other people is one of the other main reasons that I think that God wrote what He did to women. Our eyes should be opened to this danger as we are hearing quite regularly about people who fall into sinful situations with people at work or in other situations where men and women spend a lot of time together. I don’t believe this mandate of women keeping the home only applies to work opportunities. There are many other ways this contact can occur if a woman is out and about too much away from her husband and vice versa. Now do you see why this topic relates to the one about being “chaste”? So, I believe that one good reason God told women to be “Keepers at home” was to preserve our marriages! He knows our sinful natures and He knew what would happen if men and women work 8 hours a day, five days a week in the same office! He knows how easy it is to look to someone else to meet our needs if we perceive that our needs aren’t being met by our spouses! This admonition is for all ladies, even those who are single and those who have raised their children. Be on guard at all times if you are working or otherwise spending time with the husbands of other women.
And if at all possible, don’t be out there at all! Don’t work just so you can have more “stuff” or because you think you are bored at home! This brings up another reason I believe that God told women to “Be keepers at home”. He has given women many ministries within and outside the Church (besides raising children) and many of them are not getting done because so many women have put “things” ahead of people. I have been home for 34 years and I can honestly say that I have never lacked for good things to do. The opportunities for ministry are endless and we just need to respond to God’s guidelines in Scripture and be available to Him and He will keep us busy!
Next week, I will revisit this topic of being a “keeper at home”. There are, of course, issues related to raising children and possibly being under the authority of a man who isn’t your husband. Have a great week and I am keeping you all in prayer.
Saturday, June 9, 2007
Teach the Young Women to be Chaste - Titus 2:5
Wow! This is a monumental task in the culture in which we live! I am afraid I am going to be brutally honest on this one, Ladies! My children used to use the phrase, “Tell us what you REALLY think, Mom!” I think that you may concur with their assessment by the time I am finished with this one!
I am not sure if there is a misunderstanding of the meaning of the word “chaste” or what it is, but from looking around, it appears that women are really drawing a disconnect on this one! The word “chaste” (again according to Webster) means “not indulging in unlawful sexual activity; virtuous; modest: said especially of women, etc.; implies moral excellence; etc. applied in behavior, dress, speech as exhibiting purity.” Another verse that applies to this topic is in I Timothy 2: 9 where it says that women are to adorn themselves in “modest apparel”.
Most of us probably feel pretty good about the fact that we are not engaging in “unlawful sexual activity” and that is good, but there is so much more to the meaning of the word “chaste” and I would like to get very honest and personal in my teaching on this topic. Ladies, the only man we are Biblically allowed to try to attract is our husband! That means that when we dress in a way so as to attract anyone else, we are out of line with Scripture! You may think that you do not dress in order to attract anyone else, but may I remind you that God wired men so as to be attracted by what they see, and if we let them see more of us than God planned, we are committing an act of carelessness that is a sin against them by causing them to think on something that may cause sin in their life. I know the answer that some of you will respond with and that is “if they have a problem with what I wear, then it is their problem and not mine.” And they ARE responsible before God to guard their own minds, but as their Christian sisters, do we love them enough to be willing to give up our desires in order to help protect them? Our Christian brothers are bombarded on every side by sights that can cause them to lust in their hearts and many of them are trying very hard to avoid that sin, but it is a constant battle for them! I have heard some say that they wish that coming to church would be a safe haven for them and a place where they can relax from the battle and it is so disconcerting to them that they have to face the same struggles at church that they face at the mall.
May I be specific with some of the things that I am talking about? Today, Ladies, most clothing for women is just plain too low cut! I know, as I must shop in the same stores where you all shop! I know I have heard some women say that they can’t find anything else. Well, there are ways around that! When we raised our two girls, I had to get out my sewing machine more than once to sew something that was more modest than what we were able to find in the stores. It is particularly difficult through the early and late teen years. Another option is to just look through racks and racks of things and you will always find something that fits your need! You may not have as much choice as you like, but God has promised to supply our needs and He has ALWAYS more than supplied the needs of the ladies in our family! Another problem is that many clothes are designed so as to draw a person’s eyes to the wrong part of your body. Now, this is just my own personal opinion, but I believe that when a man looks at a woman, his eyes should be drawn to her face. Her demeanor and countenance should be such that she has a pleasant look on her face, and her clothing, or lack thereof, should not detract from her face! If your clothes are too low, too short, too tight, too sheer, or too “anything”, that will distract from the beauty of your face which should reflect your joy, your Godliness and your love for your Lord.
To sum it up, let’s pretend that we are going to a party where Jesus Christ is the guest of honor. How would you want to look when you are introduced to our Savior? Would you be ashamed if you were wearing some of the things that are in your closet? Would your hand immediately go across your chest to cover something that you wouldn’t want Him to see?
I am going to be away from my computer for a week or so, so I won’t be getting back to the next topic for a short time here. The next topic will relate to being a “keeper at home” and believe it or not, I believe that that topic actually relates to the one I just covered. Trust you are enjoying your summer and I look forward to sharing with you again soon! Please feel free to leave some input on this topic or any other topic! I would love to hear from you!
I am not sure if there is a misunderstanding of the meaning of the word “chaste” or what it is, but from looking around, it appears that women are really drawing a disconnect on this one! The word “chaste” (again according to Webster) means “not indulging in unlawful sexual activity; virtuous; modest: said especially of women, etc.; implies moral excellence; etc. applied in behavior, dress, speech as exhibiting purity.” Another verse that applies to this topic is in I Timothy 2: 9 where it says that women are to adorn themselves in “modest apparel”.
Most of us probably feel pretty good about the fact that we are not engaging in “unlawful sexual activity” and that is good, but there is so much more to the meaning of the word “chaste” and I would like to get very honest and personal in my teaching on this topic. Ladies, the only man we are Biblically allowed to try to attract is our husband! That means that when we dress in a way so as to attract anyone else, we are out of line with Scripture! You may think that you do not dress in order to attract anyone else, but may I remind you that God wired men so as to be attracted by what they see, and if we let them see more of us than God planned, we are committing an act of carelessness that is a sin against them by causing them to think on something that may cause sin in their life. I know the answer that some of you will respond with and that is “if they have a problem with what I wear, then it is their problem and not mine.” And they ARE responsible before God to guard their own minds, but as their Christian sisters, do we love them enough to be willing to give up our desires in order to help protect them? Our Christian brothers are bombarded on every side by sights that can cause them to lust in their hearts and many of them are trying very hard to avoid that sin, but it is a constant battle for them! I have heard some say that they wish that coming to church would be a safe haven for them and a place where they can relax from the battle and it is so disconcerting to them that they have to face the same struggles at church that they face at the mall.
May I be specific with some of the things that I am talking about? Today, Ladies, most clothing for women is just plain too low cut! I know, as I must shop in the same stores where you all shop! I know I have heard some women say that they can’t find anything else. Well, there are ways around that! When we raised our two girls, I had to get out my sewing machine more than once to sew something that was more modest than what we were able to find in the stores. It is particularly difficult through the early and late teen years. Another option is to just look through racks and racks of things and you will always find something that fits your need! You may not have as much choice as you like, but God has promised to supply our needs and He has ALWAYS more than supplied the needs of the ladies in our family! Another problem is that many clothes are designed so as to draw a person’s eyes to the wrong part of your body. Now, this is just my own personal opinion, but I believe that when a man looks at a woman, his eyes should be drawn to her face. Her demeanor and countenance should be such that she has a pleasant look on her face, and her clothing, or lack thereof, should not detract from her face! If your clothes are too low, too short, too tight, too sheer, or too “anything”, that will distract from the beauty of your face which should reflect your joy, your Godliness and your love for your Lord.
To sum it up, let’s pretend that we are going to a party where Jesus Christ is the guest of honor. How would you want to look when you are introduced to our Savior? Would you be ashamed if you were wearing some of the things that are in your closet? Would your hand immediately go across your chest to cover something that you wouldn’t want Him to see?
I am going to be away from my computer for a week or so, so I won’t be getting back to the next topic for a short time here. The next topic will relate to being a “keeper at home” and believe it or not, I believe that that topic actually relates to the one I just covered. Trust you are enjoying your summer and I look forward to sharing with you again soon! Please feel free to leave some input on this topic or any other topic! I would love to hear from you!
Sunday, June 3, 2007
"...To Be Discreet..."
“…The older women likewise…that they teach the young women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet…” Titus 2: 3-5.
As we work our way through Titus 2, we have come to the third quality to be taught by the older women and that is to teach the young women to be discreet. A related word that we use more often would be the word “discretion”. I have looked up the word “discreet” in Websters Dictionary and it says “to be careful about what one says or does”. And since what is in our thoughts usually comes out our mouths, I would add to that to be careful what we think about. There are areas where I think we can all use some reminders as we walk through our lives.
I think one of the first things that would come to our minds would be in the area of gossip. Maybe we are all thinking that we are O.K. in this area as we don’t gossip maliciously. However, gossip is one of those things that can creep in and be very subtle and we are suddenly over the line. First of all, I don’t think that men are told to be “discreet”. I think that is significant as that tells me that God is implying that this is a problem that is more natural to ladies. I have been there, so I know the pitfalls that exist and I still watch my tongue at all times in order to keep ahead of this particular pitfall!
As ladies, we have our ways of gossiping that seem very “spiritual”. One of those ways is in the area of prayer. We can sometimes update everyone on the latest news by giving it in the form of a “prayer request”. Now there is nothing wrong with praying for a personal problem of one of our friends, but I kind of use the measuring stick of, “Would I be praying for this thing if I were all alone or is it more on my mind because I have an audience with whom to share it?”
I also sometimes share things with my husband under the guise of “I just need to tell someone!” Well, if it isn’t an uplifting piece of news and if it is not something that he needs to know, then I really don’t need to burden him down with it until or unless it comes to the time when he needs to know it. Of course, I never make a promise to hear something and NOT share it with my husband. You always need to be careful of something that is told to you if you are asked to promise not to tell your husband!
So far I have mentioned a couple of areas where we need to practice discretion in our conversation. There are also ways of being indiscreet in our actions.
Ladies, we live in a culture where we are encouraged to be like men! We can take their jobs, we can wear their clothes, we can talk their language and we can shout our views. Let’s remember that “gentle and quiet spirit which is very precious in the sight of God.” (I Peter 3:4) (I will probably take that verse up in more detail at some point.) Much of this kind of thinking comes from the media that we all take into our minds. Let’s be careful of what we allow into our minds. There is VERY little on television that is of any value to us and it definitely affects our thinking and we need to be very careful of how much mindless and Godless information we allow into our minds. We are told to “renew our minds” (Romans 12:2) (That topic will come into full discussion at some point as well.) But suffice it to say that you cannot renew your mind by taking in the information that is funneled into your home without using great discretion. I know! I used to think that if I watched something on television while my kids were napping, it was probably all right as “I was mature” and I knew how to handle things that weren’t good enough for the kids to watch. Well, I was wrong! If it is not “good enough” for the kids, it is off limits to me as well. Again, Psalm 100 says “I will set NO WICKED THING before my eyes.” And Ephesians 5:12 says “It is shameful to speak of those things which are done by them in secret.” So let’s be honest with ourselves and let’s refuse to let the culture dictate what thoughts control our minds! Filth, wickedness, unfaithfulness, adultery, immorality, argumentative spirits, disobedience of children, role reversals, etc. are all things that are off limits to Christians! Let’s think about things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and good. (Philippians 4:8) This is the Biblical method for renewing your mind and thinking with true discretion!
There will be more later on renewing your mind, but for now, take one bite sized piece and work on it this week. Set one goal related to learning to be more discreet and let God give you strength and help to make one step in the right direction.
As we work our way through Titus 2, we have come to the third quality to be taught by the older women and that is to teach the young women to be discreet. A related word that we use more often would be the word “discretion”. I have looked up the word “discreet” in Websters Dictionary and it says “to be careful about what one says or does”. And since what is in our thoughts usually comes out our mouths, I would add to that to be careful what we think about. There are areas where I think we can all use some reminders as we walk through our lives.
I think one of the first things that would come to our minds would be in the area of gossip. Maybe we are all thinking that we are O.K. in this area as we don’t gossip maliciously. However, gossip is one of those things that can creep in and be very subtle and we are suddenly over the line. First of all, I don’t think that men are told to be “discreet”. I think that is significant as that tells me that God is implying that this is a problem that is more natural to ladies. I have been there, so I know the pitfalls that exist and I still watch my tongue at all times in order to keep ahead of this particular pitfall!
As ladies, we have our ways of gossiping that seem very “spiritual”. One of those ways is in the area of prayer. We can sometimes update everyone on the latest news by giving it in the form of a “prayer request”. Now there is nothing wrong with praying for a personal problem of one of our friends, but I kind of use the measuring stick of, “Would I be praying for this thing if I were all alone or is it more on my mind because I have an audience with whom to share it?”
I also sometimes share things with my husband under the guise of “I just need to tell someone!” Well, if it isn’t an uplifting piece of news and if it is not something that he needs to know, then I really don’t need to burden him down with it until or unless it comes to the time when he needs to know it. Of course, I never make a promise to hear something and NOT share it with my husband. You always need to be careful of something that is told to you if you are asked to promise not to tell your husband!
So far I have mentioned a couple of areas where we need to practice discretion in our conversation. There are also ways of being indiscreet in our actions.
Ladies, we live in a culture where we are encouraged to be like men! We can take their jobs, we can wear their clothes, we can talk their language and we can shout our views. Let’s remember that “gentle and quiet spirit which is very precious in the sight of God.” (I Peter 3:4) (I will probably take that verse up in more detail at some point.) Much of this kind of thinking comes from the media that we all take into our minds. Let’s be careful of what we allow into our minds. There is VERY little on television that is of any value to us and it definitely affects our thinking and we need to be very careful of how much mindless and Godless information we allow into our minds. We are told to “renew our minds” (Romans 12:2) (That topic will come into full discussion at some point as well.) But suffice it to say that you cannot renew your mind by taking in the information that is funneled into your home without using great discretion. I know! I used to think that if I watched something on television while my kids were napping, it was probably all right as “I was mature” and I knew how to handle things that weren’t good enough for the kids to watch. Well, I was wrong! If it is not “good enough” for the kids, it is off limits to me as well. Again, Psalm 100 says “I will set NO WICKED THING before my eyes.” And Ephesians 5:12 says “It is shameful to speak of those things which are done by them in secret.” So let’s be honest with ourselves and let’s refuse to let the culture dictate what thoughts control our minds! Filth, wickedness, unfaithfulness, adultery, immorality, argumentative spirits, disobedience of children, role reversals, etc. are all things that are off limits to Christians! Let’s think about things that are true, noble, just, pure, lovely, and good. (Philippians 4:8) This is the Biblical method for renewing your mind and thinking with true discretion!
There will be more later on renewing your mind, but for now, take one bite sized piece and work on it this week. Set one goal related to learning to be more discreet and let God give you strength and help to make one step in the right direction.
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
Loving Your Children -- Part IV
Giving Your Time
Time is something that we can give to our children that doesn’t cost anything in the way of this world’s goods. And yet, it is so very misunderstood. Again, there is no verse in the Bible that commands us to give our time to our children, but the implications are that time is a very important thing we can give to them. I believe the best Scripture that makes this clear is Deuteronomy 6:5-9.
Verse 5 tells us that we must love the Lord with our whole heart, soul and strength. And then in verse 7 we are commanded to teach “these things” to our children diligently! We are to talk about them when we are in our homes, when we are out walking, when we go to bed and when we get up in the morning. This sounds like a lot of time to me! This means that we must be WITH our children in order to accomplish this task.
I do not claim to know all that is included in “these things”, but I believe that one of the things we are to talk about is God’s faithfulness in our lives and in the lives of our family – not just our present family, but to our ancestors and those in our extended family. In that same chapter, verses 20-25, we are told that if “your son” asks you about the meaning of the things he sees and hears they should be telling him of all that the Lord did for them (the Israelites) in delivering them from the Egyptians. And I think it is even wise and helpful for us to put things up around our homes (pictures, mementos, etc.) that will cause them to ask questions and give us opportunities to share things about their heritage. Praise the Lord if they have a Godly heritage, but if they don’t there is something else that you can do! That would be to have a prayer journal and keep track of your prayers and answers so that you can show them to your children frequently so that they can see God’s work in that area of your life and so they can know that you are busy establishing a Godly heritage to pass on to them and their children. The important thing is to let your children see that God is alive and active in our lives and that He works through His people and that He has a plan for them that He is bringing about through prayer and through their family heritage.
There is a lot that could be included here in this topic about time, but I just want to cover one more item at this time and that is in the area of something we all hear in the culture. If I could, I would ask how many of you have heard the idea that it is “not the quantity of the time, but the quality that matters”? I want to go on record right now that that statement is a lie and meant to deceive loving mothers who really desire to do the right thing, but also have other things that they desire to do with their time. That statement can make us feel very good about planning our time so that we fit in a fun time at the amusement park on Saturday or on a weekend trip when we are out the rest of the week doing things we enjoy or making money so that “our kids can have everything that they need to be accepted in this world”. There is no way that we can be obedient to the mandates in Deuteronomy 6 if we are out and about most of the week except for the time we are out having some “quality time” with our kids on the weekend. I am here to tell you that small children and even some older ones may not be able to put it into words, but they would much rather have your time and attention on a daily basis just being there and providing their needs, than to have all the “stuff” or the big “thrills” that the world can provide.
So, Moms, I pray that you will take these admonitions as coming from my heart to yours. If you can apply some of these Biblical principles, your life and the lives of your children will benefit greatly through living life at the pace that God, the Creator intended was best for us! Take a walk with your kids. Plan a picnic with them and look at all the flowers that are out this time of year. Let them “help” you bake some cookies. Just enjoy them and when the time comes that they leave your home, you will not have regrets and you will not be bemoaning the fact that the time was way too short because you were way too busy or way too otherwise occupied. You only have one opportunity to raise your children. Make it count for the Lord!!!
Thursday, March 29, 2007
Loving Your Children - Part 1
Titus 2: 3&4 “That the older women likewise…teach the young women to love their husbands and to love their children.”
We talked in the last series about loving your husbands and I trust there were some practical ideas for you to practice in learning how to accomplish that. The next topic in Titus 2 relates to loving your children.
I want to point out something that kind of builds a bridge between these two admonitions and that is that loving our husbands comes first. I have been there, so I know that it is very easy, when that first little one comes into your home, to focus in on him/her and let your husband be more on his own! He, after all, is a “big man” and that little baby needs us so much! It is very easy to give all of our time to the baby and kind of let our relationship with our husbands go “on the back burner” to be picked up again after the last child leaves the home. I know all about this and I wish someone had cautioned me during those early years of motherhood as I found it very natural to give most of myself to those helpless babies and assume my husband would do well on his own. Oh, I did the necessary chores of making the meals and keeping the house relatively clean and keeping his clothes washed, but I was giving so much time and emotion to those babies that I know now that I wasn’t totally being there for my husband.
You may wonder how to balance everything during those years, and it is difficult. I think it is true that the wife (mother) sets the tone in the home and so it requires a lot of planning and dedication to keep everything in perspective. But I think that is why God gave women such an array of emotions – we have an ability to love many people at the same time and balance things that might overwhelm our husbands. And we need to remember the truth that God equips us for everything HE asks us to do. (Philippians 2:13) If we find we can’t do everything we are trying to do, then we are trying to do something that isn’t a priority to God!
First of all, it is very important that you set goals (short term and long term) for yourself and your family. Of course, you and your husband should be setting these goals together so that you are both working toward the same ends. (If you don’t have time to do that just now with your husband, think of the Biblical goals set in the Scripture and work toward those.) Next, prioritize your time. Make a list of the things that you need to do in a given day. Look over your list and cross off anything that isn’t necessary to meet your Biblical goals. Be sure to leave time for yourself to do something meaningful or helpful to your own personal growth in making you the wife and mother God wants you to be. Be sure you are getting a good amount of rest. You will function better and be more efficient if you are rested. If you are getting up in the night with children, then sleep when they do during the day. Make sure your children are at least resting an hour each afternoon – this is important for them, but it is also important for you as you need to have something left to give when your husband comes home. There are other things you can do, but this is a start.
The best thing you can do with any of the thoughts that are shared here is to take one bite-sized piece and try it tomorrow. (If I were you, I would start with the one-hour rest time for the kids!) Practice that and then add another bite-sized piece. If you always say, “I will try that some day”, you will continue on in frustration and miss some of the blessings that God has planned for you.
Well, this kind of bridges the gap between loving your husband and loving your children. These are not meant to be theological lessons, they are just thoughts from my heart that I hope will help you in a very practical way to avoid some of the pitfalls that will come your way if you follow the patterns of the culture.
I will be away from the computer for a week or so, but next time I will share my heart on how to accomplish the very important responsibility of loving your children by praying for them. Our grandson, Iain, born January 28, 2007, will be having hernia surgery on April 5. We would appreciate the prayers of anyone who would think about him on that day. As God has planned it, we were going to be in Dayton on that day anyway, so we will be able to be there with his parents to make their day a bit easier, we hope. Have a good week.
We talked in the last series about loving your husbands and I trust there were some practical ideas for you to practice in learning how to accomplish that. The next topic in Titus 2 relates to loving your children.
I want to point out something that kind of builds a bridge between these two admonitions and that is that loving our husbands comes first. I have been there, so I know that it is very easy, when that first little one comes into your home, to focus in on him/her and let your husband be more on his own! He, after all, is a “big man” and that little baby needs us so much! It is very easy to give all of our time to the baby and kind of let our relationship with our husbands go “on the back burner” to be picked up again after the last child leaves the home. I know all about this and I wish someone had cautioned me during those early years of motherhood as I found it very natural to give most of myself to those helpless babies and assume my husband would do well on his own. Oh, I did the necessary chores of making the meals and keeping the house relatively clean and keeping his clothes washed, but I was giving so much time and emotion to those babies that I know now that I wasn’t totally being there for my husband.
You may wonder how to balance everything during those years, and it is difficult. I think it is true that the wife (mother) sets the tone in the home and so it requires a lot of planning and dedication to keep everything in perspective. But I think that is why God gave women such an array of emotions – we have an ability to love many people at the same time and balance things that might overwhelm our husbands. And we need to remember the truth that God equips us for everything HE asks us to do. (Philippians 2:13) If we find we can’t do everything we are trying to do, then we are trying to do something that isn’t a priority to God!
First of all, it is very important that you set goals (short term and long term) for yourself and your family. Of course, you and your husband should be setting these goals together so that you are both working toward the same ends. (If you don’t have time to do that just now with your husband, think of the Biblical goals set in the Scripture and work toward those.) Next, prioritize your time. Make a list of the things that you need to do in a given day. Look over your list and cross off anything that isn’t necessary to meet your Biblical goals. Be sure to leave time for yourself to do something meaningful or helpful to your own personal growth in making you the wife and mother God wants you to be. Be sure you are getting a good amount of rest. You will function better and be more efficient if you are rested. If you are getting up in the night with children, then sleep when they do during the day. Make sure your children are at least resting an hour each afternoon – this is important for them, but it is also important for you as you need to have something left to give when your husband comes home. There are other things you can do, but this is a start.
The best thing you can do with any of the thoughts that are shared here is to take one bite-sized piece and try it tomorrow. (If I were you, I would start with the one-hour rest time for the kids!) Practice that and then add another bite-sized piece. If you always say, “I will try that some day”, you will continue on in frustration and miss some of the blessings that God has planned for you.
Well, this kind of bridges the gap between loving your husband and loving your children. These are not meant to be theological lessons, they are just thoughts from my heart that I hope will help you in a very practical way to avoid some of the pitfalls that will come your way if you follow the patterns of the culture.
I will be away from the computer for a week or so, but next time I will share my heart on how to accomplish the very important responsibility of loving your children by praying for them. Our grandson, Iain, born January 28, 2007, will be having hernia surgery on April 5. We would appreciate the prayers of anyone who would think about him on that day. As God has planned it, we were going to be in Dayton on that day anyway, so we will be able to be there with his parents to make their day a bit easier, we hope. Have a good week.
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Loving Your Husband Part III
Loving Your Husband - Part III
(Fun ((and inexpensive)) ways to show your husband that you love him)
Today I am just going to share some ways that I have found to be helpful in showing love to my husband over the 37 years of marriage that we have enjoyed. None of these things are in the Bible, but if they can jog your mind to think of things to do for your own husband, then risking my personal thoughts and ideas is worth it!
First of all, I remember when I was growing up, they told us that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. Well, after being married for over 37 years, I am not sure if that is entirely accurate, but I do know that it helps! Since I love to cook, it has been very fun for me to think of things to do related to food that have been an encouragement for him. If cooking isn’t your thing, you probably still like to eat good food. Part of my motivation for cooking good food is that I enjoy eating and I am too frugal (cheap) to buy it all out! There are lots of ways of finding good and fun recipes. There are cookbooks that give the most beautiful and appealing pictures of the food for you to prepare. There are very beautiful food magazines with delicious recipes that aren’t difficult. “Taste of Home” is the one that I thoroughly enjoy. And finally, there are WEB sites where you can find hundreds of recipes for anything you might like to cook! The availability of recipes is boundless!
We live within 10 miles of Lake Michigan, so one of the fun things that we enjoy from time to time is to go to the Lake and eat our supper. I make something cold (wraps, salad, etc.) along with some chips and cookies and we go over and park the car so we can see the lake and we eat our supper. If the weather permits, we often sit at one of the many picnic tables along the channel and enjoy the boats coming and going. I know that you are not all blessed to live near one of the Great Lakes, but you have your own kind of beauty wherever you live. Be sure you enjoy it with your husband/family. We often did this when our kids were still home as well.
We do go out to eat from time to time, but that isn’t our source of happiness, so when we are on the road, we often plan fun things to eat in the car. I plan things similar to the things we eat at the Lake and we enjoy things that I don’t make often when we are home. Instead of always going to a restaurant where we are bombarded with the coming and going of other people, we will just take fun things that aren’t on our “diet” and have a little enjoyment with the food!
Another thing I do to love my husband is to try to schedule my days around his schedule. I try to make sure that my “work” is done before he comes home so that I can be available to be with him and share our evenings together. I love to help him when he has a project around the house and we love to chat about the things going on in our lives. I used to tell my kids that “people are more important than things” and that is especially true in respect to our husbands! No one deserves our best time more than he does!
Finally, we love to do things together like bike riding, walking and camping. These activities are conducive to being able to spend uninterrupted time chatting without the phone and other disruptions.
I am sure that you have your own set of options, but just be sure that you schedule those things into your day! If you always talk about doing things with him in the future it will never happen, because the future never gets here! God will be glorified in the marriage of a husband and wife who are devoted to being together and doing things with each other! That is not a common sight in our culture, so you will be sure to attract others to “see your good works and glorify your Father Who is in Heaven”! Matthew 5:16
“Picnic by the Lake” recipe ideas:
Wraps: 2-4 flour tortillas
2-4 tablespoons sour cream mixed with some dry ranch dressing mix
Spread tortillas with sour cream mixture. Lay a piece of thin smoked turkey over the sour cream. Put some shredded cheddar cheese over turkey and roll up like a jelly roll. Insert a toothpick to hold. Serve with pickles – dill or sweet.
Chicken Salad: The meat from two chicken breast halves cooked and shredded.
1 cup pineapple tidbits OR chopped grapes
½ cup finely chopped celery
½ - 1 cup chopped walnuts
½ cup shredded cheese
½ cup sour cream
½ cup mayonnaise
Mix all of the above and serve over a lettuce leaf or whatever you have to make it pretty.
(Fun ((and inexpensive)) ways to show your husband that you love him)
Today I am just going to share some ways that I have found to be helpful in showing love to my husband over the 37 years of marriage that we have enjoyed. None of these things are in the Bible, but if they can jog your mind to think of things to do for your own husband, then risking my personal thoughts and ideas is worth it!
First of all, I remember when I was growing up, they told us that “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. Well, after being married for over 37 years, I am not sure if that is entirely accurate, but I do know that it helps! Since I love to cook, it has been very fun for me to think of things to do related to food that have been an encouragement for him. If cooking isn’t your thing, you probably still like to eat good food. Part of my motivation for cooking good food is that I enjoy eating and I am too frugal (cheap) to buy it all out! There are lots of ways of finding good and fun recipes. There are cookbooks that give the most beautiful and appealing pictures of the food for you to prepare. There are very beautiful food magazines with delicious recipes that aren’t difficult. “Taste of Home” is the one that I thoroughly enjoy. And finally, there are WEB sites where you can find hundreds of recipes for anything you might like to cook! The availability of recipes is boundless!
We live within 10 miles of Lake Michigan, so one of the fun things that we enjoy from time to time is to go to the Lake and eat our supper. I make something cold (wraps, salad, etc.) along with some chips and cookies and we go over and park the car so we can see the lake and we eat our supper. If the weather permits, we often sit at one of the many picnic tables along the channel and enjoy the boats coming and going. I know that you are not all blessed to live near one of the Great Lakes, but you have your own kind of beauty wherever you live. Be sure you enjoy it with your husband/family. We often did this when our kids were still home as well.
We do go out to eat from time to time, but that isn’t our source of happiness, so when we are on the road, we often plan fun things to eat in the car. I plan things similar to the things we eat at the Lake and we enjoy things that I don’t make often when we are home. Instead of always going to a restaurant where we are bombarded with the coming and going of other people, we will just take fun things that aren’t on our “diet” and have a little enjoyment with the food!
Another thing I do to love my husband is to try to schedule my days around his schedule. I try to make sure that my “work” is done before he comes home so that I can be available to be with him and share our evenings together. I love to help him when he has a project around the house and we love to chat about the things going on in our lives. I used to tell my kids that “people are more important than things” and that is especially true in respect to our husbands! No one deserves our best time more than he does!
Finally, we love to do things together like bike riding, walking and camping. These activities are conducive to being able to spend uninterrupted time chatting without the phone and other disruptions.
I am sure that you have your own set of options, but just be sure that you schedule those things into your day! If you always talk about doing things with him in the future it will never happen, because the future never gets here! God will be glorified in the marriage of a husband and wife who are devoted to being together and doing things with each other! That is not a common sight in our culture, so you will be sure to attract others to “see your good works and glorify your Father Who is in Heaven”! Matthew 5:16
“Picnic by the Lake” recipe ideas:
Wraps: 2-4 flour tortillas
2-4 tablespoons sour cream mixed with some dry ranch dressing mix
Spread tortillas with sour cream mixture. Lay a piece of thin smoked turkey over the sour cream. Put some shredded cheddar cheese over turkey and roll up like a jelly roll. Insert a toothpick to hold. Serve with pickles – dill or sweet.
Chicken Salad: The meat from two chicken breast halves cooked and shredded.
1 cup pineapple tidbits OR chopped grapes
½ cup finely chopped celery
½ - 1 cup chopped walnuts
½ cup shredded cheese
½ cup sour cream
½ cup mayonnaise
Mix all of the above and serve over a lettuce leaf or whatever you have to make it pretty.
Friday, March 16, 2007
Love Your Husbands Part 2 - Titus 2:3,4
My last entry was concerning the responsibility for wives to love their husbands. I shared three areas which are important manifestations of your love for him. They were:
Keep yourself looking nice and attractive to him. (And ONLY him!)
Keep your home looking warm and clean for him.
Keep good and enjoyable food on the table.
Today I want to just add a couple more ideas of ways you can love your husband. (There are MANY more. Be creative!)
First of all, loving your husband involves giving him high respect! Scripture doesn’t exactly use the word “respect” but in Ephesians 5:22, we are told to “submit to your own husband as to the Lord”. Is there a better way to show respect than to submit to his desires and plans? I know this is not a popular practice in our culture, but we are under the authority of the Word of God and not under the whims of the culture. I do not want to get into a whole discussion here about wifely submission, I just want to remind us all that God is the final authority on marriage and it was all His plan and design and the ways of the culture haven’t proven themselves to be very sound and don’t have a good track record. So we need to listen to the one Who ordained marriage instead of the culture which is very good at destroying marriages!
The last point that I want to mention today is to pray for your husband and let him know that you are doing just that. I know that many of us know this in our heads, but how often do we actually remember during our busy days to pray for the man that God has given us for our lifetime companion? How often do you remember to thank God for your husband? (While we are on the topic of being thankful, when is the last time you thanked your husband for being your husband?) If prayer is our God-given way to talk with our Heavenly Father, then let’s be sure we come each day to talk with God about the man God has blessed us with and let us allow God to use us to be a blessing to him!
May we all be encouraged to see how God might use some of these thoughts in our marriages as we seek to be the wives that God has called us to be!
Keep yourself looking nice and attractive to him. (And ONLY him!)
Keep your home looking warm and clean for him.
Keep good and enjoyable food on the table.
Today I want to just add a couple more ideas of ways you can love your husband. (There are MANY more. Be creative!)
First of all, loving your husband involves giving him high respect! Scripture doesn’t exactly use the word “respect” but in Ephesians 5:22, we are told to “submit to your own husband as to the Lord”. Is there a better way to show respect than to submit to his desires and plans? I know this is not a popular practice in our culture, but we are under the authority of the Word of God and not under the whims of the culture. I do not want to get into a whole discussion here about wifely submission, I just want to remind us all that God is the final authority on marriage and it was all His plan and design and the ways of the culture haven’t proven themselves to be very sound and don’t have a good track record. So we need to listen to the one Who ordained marriage instead of the culture which is very good at destroying marriages!
The last point that I want to mention today is to pray for your husband and let him know that you are doing just that. I know that many of us know this in our heads, but how often do we actually remember during our busy days to pray for the man that God has given us for our lifetime companion? How often do you remember to thank God for your husband? (While we are on the topic of being thankful, when is the last time you thanked your husband for being your husband?) If prayer is our God-given way to talk with our Heavenly Father, then let’s be sure we come each day to talk with God about the man God has blessed us with and let us allow God to use us to be a blessing to him!
May we all be encouraged to see how God might use some of these thoughts in our marriages as we seek to be the wives that God has called us to be!
Monday, February 12, 2007
Older Women To Teach The Younger
The concept of the older women teaching the younger women is one that has gotten somewhat lost in the culture. In our culture, even within the Church, age has become something not to be revered, but something to at least dread and at most to be totally avoided if possible! It is not commendable to look older, much less to have thoughts and ideas that are from a bygone era. However, Biblically, God has given older women a very important duty, that of teaching the younger women! Maybe that is why husbands aren’t being loved (respected) as they ought to be. We as older women need to be obedient to God’s mandates no matter how the culture dictates and according to
Titus 2:4, one of our main duties is to teach the younger women “to love their husbands and to love their children”. (I will address exactly what I see that means at a later time, but for now, I will focus on the teaching.)
So who are the older women? Well, we are all older than someone and some of us are older than many! If we have experience in the Christian walk and if we have young ladies or girls that are under our realm of influence, then we are to teach them the things that God has instilled on our hearts through His Word. We are not all able to have audiences of hundreds or even tens as some of the godly ladies that God has gifted for public speaking, but most of us have daughters and others in our families who need to be taught and encouraged to step out from the mold and do what God has commanded!
How do we go about teaching these principles? “Example” is one good way, and it is VERY important that our example support our words, but the words MUST be there as well. Without the words of admonishment from God’s Word, our example may be considered just that, an example or a preference. This principle of the older teaching the younger is not just a preference, it is a command, and we need to be sure that we let that be known. Our culture is so relativistic, and we need to be sure that Christian young ladies know that God’s commands are not relative, they are mandates backed up with Truth. And if they truly are commands of God, then not to obey them is sin.
Let’s make a difference in our homes and our churches and let’s be “doers of the Word and not hearers only!” James 1:22. This is part of the motivation for this blog! May God use these thoughts in the hearts of my own daughters and grand daughters and if He so chooses, may He use them in the hearts of many other young ladies for His Glory!
Titus 2:4, one of our main duties is to teach the younger women “to love their husbands and to love their children”. (I will address exactly what I see that means at a later time, but for now, I will focus on the teaching.)
So who are the older women? Well, we are all older than someone and some of us are older than many! If we have experience in the Christian walk and if we have young ladies or girls that are under our realm of influence, then we are to teach them the things that God has instilled on our hearts through His Word. We are not all able to have audiences of hundreds or even tens as some of the godly ladies that God has gifted for public speaking, but most of us have daughters and others in our families who need to be taught and encouraged to step out from the mold and do what God has commanded!
How do we go about teaching these principles? “Example” is one good way, and it is VERY important that our example support our words, but the words MUST be there as well. Without the words of admonishment from God’s Word, our example may be considered just that, an example or a preference. This principle of the older teaching the younger is not just a preference, it is a command, and we need to be sure that we let that be known. Our culture is so relativistic, and we need to be sure that Christian young ladies know that God’s commands are not relative, they are mandates backed up with Truth. And if they truly are commands of God, then not to obey them is sin.
Let’s make a difference in our homes and our churches and let’s be “doers of the Word and not hearers only!” James 1:22. This is part of the motivation for this blog! May God use these thoughts in the hearts of my own daughters and grand daughters and if He so chooses, may He use them in the hearts of many other young ladies for His Glory!
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