Last week I started sharing some things that are on my heart and mind. Some of the material last week and some of the material this week is taken from the booklet: “The Look-Does God Really Care What I Wear?” by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.
I will start today by sharing a quote by a 17th Century pastor, Richard Baxter, who said: “We must walk among sinful persons as you would do with a candle among straw or gun powder or else you may see the flame, which you did not foresee, when it is too late to quench it.” We are our brothers’ keepers and we are to look out for the welfare of our Christian brothers. Hebrews 10:24 says, “And let us consider one another in order to stir up love and good works.” Romans 15:1 says, “We then who are strong ought to bear with the scruples of the weak, and not to please ourselves.” We are to strengthen each other and “stir up good works”. We cannot do this by wearing things that cause impure or lustful thoughts in the minds of our brothers. We are not to defraud our brothers by creating in them expectations that we can’t/won’t righteously fulfill!
God’s plan in Creation was for the race to multiply. So in order to accomplish that, He created men to be very visual and to pursue and He made women to be very relational and to respond. With this in mind, it is our responsibility to handle these characteristics in a very godly and obedient manner. Proverbs 21:20 says that “the eyes of a man are never satisfied.” Along with these physical and sexual characteristics, God gave some natural barriers and protection such as embarrassment and naivety which our culture is working very hard to break down! If you want to see documented proof of this, you should take some time to read the book: “Christian Modesty and the Public Undressing of America” by Jeff Pollard. When our children were in High School, we went to a meeting in preparation for the year of “Sex Education” and we were told by someone who represented the local Health Department that one of their goals is to “break down the barriers between the genders and help them feel comfortable with each other when discussing all sexual matters!” Is it any wonder that the young teens feel very natural and comfortable having sexual contact at an early age! God placed those barriers there for our benefit and protection and it is up to us to guard that in our homes and by teaching our young girls how to dress!
At the risk of sounding too old fashioned (If you think I am old fashioned, you are right, but I carry that label proudly), I want to give some examples here of clothing that poses problems for our brothers. I think the easiest way would be to make a list, so here goes:
Anything that exposes intimate or alluring parts of our bodies such as low cut shirts or blouses. (According to men, breasts are the most alluring part of the female body.)
Anything that emphasizes intimate parts of the female body. (Some clothing is designed to draw eyes to a certain part of the body. Eyes should be drawn to our faces.)
Anything that teases with “just a hint” of exposure. Sometimes “teasing” is worse that full exposure.)
Tight clothing. “Clothing should be tight enough to show you are a woman, and loose enough to show you are a lady.”
Underwear that shows through clothing or that is designed to show. (Be careful of those white pants!)
Anything that is too low, too tight, too short or too sheer. If you wear “low rise” pants, then you need a long shirt! Or a short shirt should be accompanied with “high rise” pants!
I pray that each of us will resolve to please God, to bring glory to God, and to have a modest and pure heart!
Finally:
1. Don’t compare yourself with the wrong standard! The Bible is our standard!
2. We are God’s representatives, no matter what our age. Let’s dress for the occasion!
3. Save all your “treasures” for one man – your husband! Dress for HIM!!!
4. When someone looks at you, their eyes should be drawn to your face. That is where your joy and peace and beauty should be emanating from your inner beauty.
Checklist:
1. Bend over and see what happens to your hemline or to the meeting of your blouse and skirt.
2. Check skirt lengths and slits when you sit down.
3. Check to see how your arms fit in your sleeveless clothing. No one should be able to see in and out the other side.
4. Check to see how much can be seen through your clothing.
5. Bend over and see what happens at the top of your shirt or blouse.
“Lord, give me a modest heart! Let me be a woman of grace and love enough to protect my Christian brothers.”
Saturday, September 22, 2007
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Modesty -- Part 2
Much of the material for this entry comes from a booklet by Nancy Leigh DeMoss called: “The Look – Does God Really Care What I Wear?” Nancy Leigh DeMoss is an excellent teacher and I highly recommend reading anything that you can get that is written by her. She also has a daily radio program called: “Revive Our Hearts”.
Last week, I tried to build a case for the discussion of Christian Modesty by quoting some material by Joshua Harris. It is my prayer and hope that we as Christian ladies will have enough desire to please God and enough love for our Christian brothers to do what we can to protect them and make things easier for them. We live in a culture that is very difficult for all of us, but it is especially difficult for our brothers who are trying to live a Godly life and continually have temptations thrown in their faces. We ladies need to realize that God has programmed males to be very visual, so it is normal for them to be stimulated by what they see. It is up to them to “flee temptation”, but it becomes increasingly difficult when they are faced at every turn with bodies that are not covered properly. I have heard some men say that they would just love it if they could come to church and feel “safe”, but to a great extent, that is not possible because even there some have taken on the “dress” of the culture and expose more than they should.
It is interesting to note as we start in Genesis with the first two people that they “were naked and were not ashamed” (Genesis 2:25). Then sin came along and their consciences were awakened and they knew that they were naked. (Genesis 3:7) They tried to cover themselves by making aprons out of fig leaves (Genesis 3:7), but God made them coats from the skins of animals (Genesis 3:21). It took the shedding of blood for God to cover them with those skins. Ever after that, clothing in the Bible is a picture of God covering our sins. It is interesting that as we “progress” as a culture, we are more and more reverting back to the original condition of nakedness that was the symbol of the awakening of the conscience as a result of sin.
There are three important principles that should govern our dress. The first one is the principle of “ownership”. We are not our own! (I Corinthians 6:19&20) We therefore do not have the right to dress any way we desire. The second principle is the principle of “Lordship”. (Romans 14:8&9) We cannot say, “I am not going to dress modestly, Lord.” (I Timothy 2:8&9). If we choose to disobey Him, then He is not our Lord at that point! And finally, we have the principle of “citizenship”. Romans 12:2 tells us not to be conformed to this world. That includes the way we dress. Also, I John 2:15 & 16 tells us not to love the world. We belong to a different Kingdom! “This world is NOT my home”! Praise the Lord! Every time we go out of our homes, it should be on our minds that we represent the God of the universe, the one Who gave Himself for us so that we don’t have to pay for our own sins! How can we go out wearing something that shows parts of our bodies that God says are to be covered – especially knowing that we may be defrauding (look in the last entry for an explanation of what it means to “defraud”) some young men (or older men) who are trying to keep their minds focused on Godly things! Here is a quote for you: “Women sin when they purposely or carelessly wear clothes that cause a man to sin”. Think about that and remember that we ARE “our brothers’ keeper”. Paul said that if meat would cause his brother to stumble, then he wouldn’t eat meat. How much more should we be willing to give up something that causes our brothers to sin!
Next week, I will continue this discussion on modesty. I am very passionate about this topic as I am very offended by women who dress in such a way as to cause difficulties for my husband or my sons or my grandkids! I feel like a “mother bear” on this topic, and I just pray that I can pass the passion on to each one who reads this and I hope you will pass it on as well! (Soon we will be finished with this topic and we can have some fun with recipes or something!)
Last week, I tried to build a case for the discussion of Christian Modesty by quoting some material by Joshua Harris. It is my prayer and hope that we as Christian ladies will have enough desire to please God and enough love for our Christian brothers to do what we can to protect them and make things easier for them. We live in a culture that is very difficult for all of us, but it is especially difficult for our brothers who are trying to live a Godly life and continually have temptations thrown in their faces. We ladies need to realize that God has programmed males to be very visual, so it is normal for them to be stimulated by what they see. It is up to them to “flee temptation”, but it becomes increasingly difficult when they are faced at every turn with bodies that are not covered properly. I have heard some men say that they would just love it if they could come to church and feel “safe”, but to a great extent, that is not possible because even there some have taken on the “dress” of the culture and expose more than they should.
It is interesting to note as we start in Genesis with the first two people that they “were naked and were not ashamed” (Genesis 2:25). Then sin came along and their consciences were awakened and they knew that they were naked. (Genesis 3:7) They tried to cover themselves by making aprons out of fig leaves (Genesis 3:7), but God made them coats from the skins of animals (Genesis 3:21). It took the shedding of blood for God to cover them with those skins. Ever after that, clothing in the Bible is a picture of God covering our sins. It is interesting that as we “progress” as a culture, we are more and more reverting back to the original condition of nakedness that was the symbol of the awakening of the conscience as a result of sin.
There are three important principles that should govern our dress. The first one is the principle of “ownership”. We are not our own! (I Corinthians 6:19&20) We therefore do not have the right to dress any way we desire. The second principle is the principle of “Lordship”. (Romans 14:8&9) We cannot say, “I am not going to dress modestly, Lord.” (I Timothy 2:8&9). If we choose to disobey Him, then He is not our Lord at that point! And finally, we have the principle of “citizenship”. Romans 12:2 tells us not to be conformed to this world. That includes the way we dress. Also, I John 2:15 & 16 tells us not to love the world. We belong to a different Kingdom! “This world is NOT my home”! Praise the Lord! Every time we go out of our homes, it should be on our minds that we represent the God of the universe, the one Who gave Himself for us so that we don’t have to pay for our own sins! How can we go out wearing something that shows parts of our bodies that God says are to be covered – especially knowing that we may be defrauding (look in the last entry for an explanation of what it means to “defraud”) some young men (or older men) who are trying to keep their minds focused on Godly things! Here is a quote for you: “Women sin when they purposely or carelessly wear clothes that cause a man to sin”. Think about that and remember that we ARE “our brothers’ keeper”. Paul said that if meat would cause his brother to stumble, then he wouldn’t eat meat. How much more should we be willing to give up something that causes our brothers to sin!
Next week, I will continue this discussion on modesty. I am very passionate about this topic as I am very offended by women who dress in such a way as to cause difficulties for my husband or my sons or my grandkids! I feel like a “mother bear” on this topic, and I just pray that I can pass the passion on to each one who reads this and I hope you will pass it on as well! (Soon we will be finished with this topic and we can have some fun with recipes or something!)
Friday, September 7, 2007
Modesty - Part 1
I can’t write the date of September 7 without remembering that it was 34 years ago today that I became a mother! And what a wonderful ride it has been! Happy Birthday, Tim!
I told you last week that I was going to talk about modesty today, and I will. I briefly covered some things related to this topic on June 2 when I was covering Titus 2. However, since then I did some more extensive study on the topic and taught it in our church Ladies Bible Study, so I want to cover it more thoroughly now.
This is a topic about which I am VERY passionate, and I pray that I can pass some of that passion on to those who read this. I first of all want to remind all of us that God created the genders and He created marriage and the normal attraction between the genders. He created men to be visually stimulated and to be attracted to females in a physical way in order that His design for marriage and reproduction might be fulfilled. (Genesis 2:24 and Malachi 2:15) He created females to be responsive and very relational in order that they might be able to love their husbands and nurture the children that are God’s intended fruit of that marriage union. So, the fact that men respond to the sensual manner of dress among women that we see flaunted so brazenly in our culture, is not a surprise to God and it shouldn’t be a surprise to us. It should however, be a caution to us as women to be careful how we dress so as not to defraud our Christian brothers (or those outside the Body who don’t even know how to control the stimulation they receive from seeing such things). (Just a note here on what it means to defraud someone – It is like placing several bowls of fine chocolate around my house and then telling me that I can’t have any! When we “tease” our Brothers by what we wear, but then there is no way, either righteously or any other way they can act upon their desires, we are defrauding them!)
Now one thing that we need to make perfectly clear is that men are totally and solely responsible for any acts of immorality that they commit! Women, however, sin when they consciously or carelessly place temptation before men (defraud) so as to cause them to lust sinfully! (I Thessalonians 4:1-6)
I would like to mention a few comments I heard on a tape called “Not Even a Hint” by Joshua Harris. (If you think you are familiar with that name, I will remind you that he is the young man who wrote the book, “I Kissed Dating Good-Bye”.) I trust that these thoughts stated by him will help make the case for why this is such an important issue and why we as Christian women need to be educated on this topic. I fear that, though some flaunt their bodies knowingly before men, many are just plain not aware of or simply don’t care how this affects men or of the mandates in Scripture concerning this very important issue!
Here are the statements from the tape, and though maybe not verbatim, they are close to direct quotes:
1. “Modesty is about saving the delight of your body for ONE man, your husband.”
2. “Modesty is a matter of the Heart, Life, and Manner of dress.”
3. “God has given women a precious and powerful gift.”
4. “The purity God calls us to is a ‘gift’ for us.”
5. “Sin has infected and affected everything that God created.”
6. “Our culture encourages women to flaunt their sexuality! Fashion trends exploit sexuality and emphasize sexual parts of the body.”
7. “You are the only person on this planet who can protect your spouse sexually.”
8. Then Josh quoted Al Mohler (President of the Southern Baptist Convention): “Men are tempted to give themselves to pornography, while women are tempted to commit pornography.” (Josh Harris: “When women dress in such a way so as to arouse sexual desire in a man, they are committing pornography.”)
My heart desires to share this material in a straightforward manner so as to cause us to be aware of the problem and to build up a love and concern for our Christian brothers that will manifest itself in our desire to protect them in any way we can and help to build them up spiritually (Romans 15:1; Hebrews 10:24) and not break down their defenses. Please pray about your response to this and let’s search the Scripture to see how we can accomplish this goal. Next week I will give more specific guidelines and Scripture that will help us to grow in this very important area.
I told you last week that I was going to talk about modesty today, and I will. I briefly covered some things related to this topic on June 2 when I was covering Titus 2. However, since then I did some more extensive study on the topic and taught it in our church Ladies Bible Study, so I want to cover it more thoroughly now.
This is a topic about which I am VERY passionate, and I pray that I can pass some of that passion on to those who read this. I first of all want to remind all of us that God created the genders and He created marriage and the normal attraction between the genders. He created men to be visually stimulated and to be attracted to females in a physical way in order that His design for marriage and reproduction might be fulfilled. (Genesis 2:24 and Malachi 2:15) He created females to be responsive and very relational in order that they might be able to love their husbands and nurture the children that are God’s intended fruit of that marriage union. So, the fact that men respond to the sensual manner of dress among women that we see flaunted so brazenly in our culture, is not a surprise to God and it shouldn’t be a surprise to us. It should however, be a caution to us as women to be careful how we dress so as not to defraud our Christian brothers (or those outside the Body who don’t even know how to control the stimulation they receive from seeing such things). (Just a note here on what it means to defraud someone – It is like placing several bowls of fine chocolate around my house and then telling me that I can’t have any! When we “tease” our Brothers by what we wear, but then there is no way, either righteously or any other way they can act upon their desires, we are defrauding them!)
Now one thing that we need to make perfectly clear is that men are totally and solely responsible for any acts of immorality that they commit! Women, however, sin when they consciously or carelessly place temptation before men (defraud) so as to cause them to lust sinfully! (I Thessalonians 4:1-6)
I would like to mention a few comments I heard on a tape called “Not Even a Hint” by Joshua Harris. (If you think you are familiar with that name, I will remind you that he is the young man who wrote the book, “I Kissed Dating Good-Bye”.) I trust that these thoughts stated by him will help make the case for why this is such an important issue and why we as Christian women need to be educated on this topic. I fear that, though some flaunt their bodies knowingly before men, many are just plain not aware of or simply don’t care how this affects men or of the mandates in Scripture concerning this very important issue!
Here are the statements from the tape, and though maybe not verbatim, they are close to direct quotes:
1. “Modesty is about saving the delight of your body for ONE man, your husband.”
2. “Modesty is a matter of the Heart, Life, and Manner of dress.”
3. “God has given women a precious and powerful gift.”
4. “The purity God calls us to is a ‘gift’ for us.”
5. “Sin has infected and affected everything that God created.”
6. “Our culture encourages women to flaunt their sexuality! Fashion trends exploit sexuality and emphasize sexual parts of the body.”
7. “You are the only person on this planet who can protect your spouse sexually.”
8. Then Josh quoted Al Mohler (President of the Southern Baptist Convention): “Men are tempted to give themselves to pornography, while women are tempted to commit pornography.” (Josh Harris: “When women dress in such a way so as to arouse sexual desire in a man, they are committing pornography.”)
My heart desires to share this material in a straightforward manner so as to cause us to be aware of the problem and to build up a love and concern for our Christian brothers that will manifest itself in our desire to protect them in any way we can and help to build them up spiritually (Romans 15:1; Hebrews 10:24) and not break down their defenses. Please pray about your response to this and let’s search the Scripture to see how we can accomplish this goal. Next week I will give more specific guidelines and Scripture that will help us to grow in this very important area.
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